


Good Omens Movie Script (1992)

by PlushyButtons



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 1992 Movie Script Aziraphale (Good Omens), 1992 Movie Script Crowley (Good Omens), DNI if your name is Neil, Good Omens Movie Script (1992), Screenplay/Script Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:28:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27704147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlushyButtons/pseuds/PlushyButtons
Summary: Here lies the true copy of Neilman's edgy movie script of Good Omens.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	Good Omens Movie Script (1992)

FADE IN: 

EXT. GARDEN OF EDEN-- DAY. 

We are looking at a couple cuddling in the grass. This is ADAM and EVE. ADAM and EVE hug in the garden, wearing fig leaves. 

EVE 

I'm so glad. I'm so glad our apple tree finally grew and sprouted fruitful appley apples. 

ADAM 

Me too. I mean, imagine, we can make apple juice. Apple pie. Apple cinnamon pie. 

EVE

I think it's the most valuable property that we have. 

The camera moves around the scene. On the left of them is the serpent-- a big green snake wearing dark glasses. CROWLEY enters the frame as ADAM and EVE speak to each other. He is slithering between the foliage. 

CROWLEY is dressed all in black. He's elegant and very cool. He's wearing DARK GLASSES. 

ADAM 

I do agree. I think we should go to the bank and get a loan. Actually, I think we should just get apple tree insurance. 

EVE 

( _giggling_ ) I think you're right.

CROWLEY slithers up the apple tree and begins to steal apples, like a whore. 

ADAM 

And then get a loan and then use the apple tree as collateral because it is now insurance. I truly do love our apple tree! 

EVE 

Just imagine. A life full of apple trees! 

ADAM 

I know! And all of our beautiful apples. There's 

EVE & ADAM 

-endless possibilities. 

CROWLEY places the stolen apples down the inside of his clothing. 

ADAM 

They're so beautiful. 

EVE 

I wish I were an apple. 

ADAM 

You wish you were an apple? If you were an apple, I'd put you on my shelf and cherish you like I cherish all our apples. 

EVE 

( _sighs_ ) That's so beautiful.

ADAM 

I try. 

On the right stands an Angel in white, with long white hair, holding a flaming sword. He walks into the scene. This is AZIRAPHALE. 

AZIRAPHALE is wearing all white, and his clothes are much more rumpled than the adversary's. His hair is white too. 

AZIRAPHALE 

I only hope that the whores aren't stealing your apples. Y'know, those naughty apple whores always... steal apples. 

ADAM 

We do have a couple of those apple whores in this- in this community. 

EVE 

Those damn apple stealing whores! 

AZIRAPHALE 

I hate them. Because n- no one should take your prized apples from you. 

EVE 

Hey, has it been about ten seconds since we've looked at our apple tree? 

ADAM

It has been about ten seconds since we've looked at our apple tree. 

AZIRAPHALE 

Gosh. 

AZIRAPHALE, ADAM, and EVE turn around to discover CROWLEY whorily stealing apples from the apple tree. CROWLEY has been caught. 

AZIRAPHALE 

_**HEY WHAT THE FUCK?** _

FADE OUT. 

Over the END CREDITS we hear the original Buddy Holly version of Every Day ( _"Every day It's a getting closer, going faster than a roller coaster..._ "). 

And the END CREDITS roll... 

**END**

Neilman. January 1992.


End file.
